Question and AnswerWho Pays for the Wedding?

Question and AnswerWho Pays for the Wedding?

International Customs

The question of who pays for what during a wedding can become complicated quickly. In the United States, traditionally, both the bride and groom’s family are expected to cover the tab for certain aspects of the wedding. However, this is often negotiated depending upon the unique traits of the wedding and the wishes of both the bride and the groom.

If you are marrying someone from another country, the norms for who is expected to pay may vary wildly. A few of the common norms from other countries include:

australia

Australia: The bride and her family would generally cover expenses such as the bride’s dress, the venue, cake, decorations, and other expenses. The groom’s family would be responsible for paying for the engagement ring, the honeymoon, and flowers for the bride.

chinaChina: The groom’s family will usually assume the expenses for the entire wedding.

czechCzech Republic: The groom generally pays for the wedding.

Hong KongHong Kong: Historically, the groom pays for the wedding and also gives additional money to the bride’s family.

indiaIndia: With arranged marriages or those that have the consent of both families, the bride’s family will pay for the wedding and sometimes even provide a dowry. With a love marriage that is not consented to, both the bride and groom would contribute to the costs as they could.

IndonesiaIndonesia: The groom’s family generally pays the bills, although sometimes the cost is shared.

japanJapan: The families will negotiate and determine who will pay for the wedding and how much to spend on it.

koreaKorea: Historically, the bride and her family usually assume the cost of the wedding, although it is not uncommon for modern Korean weddings to split some of the expenses.

Latin AmericaLatin America: In most Latin American countries, the wedding is sponsored by the families of both parties, and both sides are expected to pitch in with the financial needs of the family. Extended family members, such as grandparents and godparents, can also contribute, as can good friends.

MalaysiaMalaysia: Generally, the two families will meet and discuss how much the groom’s family will provide to the bride’s family for expenses, including those related to the wedding. The expected amount of money is set by a council.

PhilippinesPhilippines: Traditionally, the groom’s family would be expected to assume all wedding expenses. However, in modern times, the bride and/or her family would contribute to the costs.

RussiaRussia: The groom generally covers the costs of the wedding, although the bride will usually pay for wedding flowers, gifts for her attendants, the groom’s ring, and a present for the groom.

SingaporeSingapore: In Singapore, the costs are usually split between both families. The groom and his family will pay for the wedding expenses, and the bride and her family will pay for certain things, such as dresses and gifts.

koreaSouth Korea: The two families will meet before the wedding to discuss the sharing of financial contributions.

SpainSpain: In the past, the bride’s father would be expected to pay for the wedding. However, in modern Spanish weddings, it is common for many family members or friends to contribute to a fund for the wedding. Sponsors, such as godparents, may be honored for their contributions during the ceremony.

SwedenSweden: The bride’s parents would generally pay for the wedding. It is customary in Sweden that guests will pay for dinner and drinks to help with the expenses associated with the event.

TaiwanTaiwan: The groom’s family is expected to pay for most of the wedding.

ThailandThailand: Usually, the groom will pay for the wedding, and sometimes the groom is also expected to provide a dowry for the bride’s family.

Religious Customs

Weddings expenses may also be treated differently based upon the religion of the betrothed. Some common religion-based differences related to wedding expenses include:

Buddhism: Buddhist weddings are generally very small and very private affairs. The groom’s family will provide food and refreshments, as well as jewelry for the bride to wear. The groom is also expected to pay a dowry to the bride’s family.

Christianity: Traditionally, the bride and her family would assume all wedding expenses.

Hinduism: In Hindu weddings, the wedding is usually paid for by the family of both parties equally.

Islam: There are no legal rulings in Islamic tradition that dictates who pays for wedding expenses; however, men are generally responsible for all financial expenses. It is still common in Islam for the groom to provide a Mahr, or dowry, directly to the bride. This payment symbolizes love, respect, and courtesy. It is also something that belongs to her in the event of a divorce.

Orthodox Judaism: In the Orthodox community, the groom’s family pays for flowers, liquor, the music, photographer, and shaytel, or the wig worn by a married woman.

Shinto: In Shinto weddings, either the bride’s family will pay, the groom’s family will pay, or they will agree to split the expenses.

New Age Customs

While the guidelines listed above cover many traditional customs when it comes to paying for weddings, it’s also crucial to understand that many of these practices have evolved over time. In 2021, there are many new and modern practices that come into play related to wedding expenses.

Rather than following the strict traditions of the bride’s parents paying for the ceremony and the groom’s family hosting the reception and honeymoon, many families split the expenses. They may also each contribute what their budget allows.

Additionally, many modern wedding couples have assumed more of the expenses than they have in the past. Looking at modern wedding payment trends, we see that:

Overall Assistance: Most couples – about 72 – receive some financial support. For heterosexual couples, the parents of the bride are still the primary financinal contributors in approximately 93% of weddings. In these weddings, they would likely provide a fixed dollar amount and let the couple decide how it is spent. Overall, the parents for both parties generally cover a little over half (52%) of the total wedding expenses with the couple assuming the rest of the expenses.

Millennial Weddings: Millennial couples are defined as those born between 1981 and 1996 pay for about 42$ of the wedding expenses while the parents pick up 56%.

Generation X: The Generation X cohort, or those born between 1965 and 1980 pay for more of the wedding expenses. For this group, the could pay for about 78% of the wedding, while parents contribute approximately 20%.

LGBTQIA+: Couples that identify in this group often pay for nearly two-thirds (61%) of the wedding expense, while parents contribute 37%.

Subsequent Weddings: For second weddings, the couple often assumes most of the expenses, paying for nearly 88% while the parents chip in 10%.

Since there are no hard and fast guidelines on modern wedding expenses, many couples are opting for minimal ceremonies to reduce expenses. Alternatively, they may also try to save on expenses by doing some of the things themselves, such as making cenerpieces and flower arrangements. No matter what the couple and their families decide – it’s about making the day special in a way that fits every couples’ wishes!